I loved this, Tamy! These words are so true and powerful: "...at times, these virtual worlds collide wildly inside of our minds in a given moment. When we awaken to the fact that this collision is inviting us to return to the present moment, we can intentionally come back to the here and now."
Our brains are such powerful time machines, and anxiety and trauma so often want to take the past and slingshot us into the future, and the future is never good when anxiety is at the helm. This is a powerful reminder to stay in today. Thank you!
Trauma can have the most in opportune triggers. I’m an emergency veterinarian and have struggled with leaving the events of the day at work so as to be present with my family when home. It’s a continual practice to stay in the present moment. Thank you for sharing this.
I 100% agree that trauma works its way into our everyday lives through our active minds. That’s where my journey of self-discovery has supported me in having a deep practice of presencing so that I don’t miss out on my life by living in the past/future thoughts in my head.
It definitely takes intention and attention as well as a commitment to practice. We get good at what we practice! 😊💫
I completely relate to the flashes of past & present. Cases I've had that remind me of my own past, or of my family & friends. It's part of our soul connections & our empathic skills. Our ability to walk into any situation & know if it's good or bad right away. That's what makes us great at our jobs, it also makes us more sensitive to our jobs at the same time. I can't tell you how many flashbacks I would have while I was on the ambulance. Sometimes it would get kind of crazy. Like you said; it's about knowing how to bring yourself back into the reality of the moment. That's part of the reason why I went from picking up the pieces on the streets to putting them back together in the OR. Those flashbacks of past & present were sometimes Really hard. Trying to stay in the moment even when you're in the middle of a procedure handing off instruments & the surgeon starts yelling at you for suction because there's a major bleed...Not so good. Thankfully, you're not the only one in there that's scrubbed in.
I've been giving myself permission since I was a little girl, even when I wasn't supposed to. I gave myself permission to cry when I was alone in my room; sitting by my window looking out the window looking at the moon, wondering why I was really here & why I had to deal with so much pain. I had to be the adult at home, I wasn't 'allowed' to be the little girl I was. At my grandparents though I gave myself permission to laugh & play & Be that little girl. As a teen I gave myself permission to hide part of who I was. Only a select few knew I was volunteering at the hospital other than my patients & coworkers. It was part of my escape from the chaos of what was happening at home & school, where no one could find me. It also prepared me for my careers in the medical profession that I couldn't wait to become a part of. It had been my dream & goal ever since I can remember. My mother & I fought over my high school choices because she either didn't want me traveling to school or didn't want me in her old neighborhood because she didn't think it was 'safe'. I just found my own trouble or it found me. High school became my nemesis in more ways than I will share here. My sophomore year was any teen girls worst nightmare come true; the kind of thing you see in movies & pray doesn't happen. I give myself permission to be forgiving but not forget; yet not stay in those tapes playing them over & over again. I give myself permission to grieve the killing of my husband by 2 kids coming home from a party & running the red light. I grieve my husbands death and I give myself permission to forgive those kids. All of them died on the scene before the fire department arrived. Today it's about staying in the moment. I give myself permission to let me be me. I make no excuses or apologies...Love me or hate me, I am who I am, take it or leave it; it's your choice. I not only like who I am, I love who I am today despite what I've been through & I've had to do to get where I am at this moment.
Raven, your share touched me deeply. Thank you for your raw and open sharing . I honor and am inspired by all the permission that you are giving yourself in your life. Thank you for sharing yourself here.🙏✨
I was thinking about whether I should do this in a post and tag you, or respond here, but since you asked, I will respond here:
I have never been a medical professional, but you and I share careers that have their fair share of traumatic event events. I did child protection investigations for 15 years, moved into working with homelessness and mental health for 8 years, and most recently I have been managing programs in domestic violence and sexually exploited youth work. Since I’ve been doing this work, starting as a therapist with children who experienced traumatic events 30 years ago, I often have gotten the question about how I deal with some of the things that I have seen. The best way that I can answer that is that I have so much respect for the kindergarten teacher who manages her classroom in a way that I could never do. We all have different passions and strengths, and for whatever reason, I have been able to stay calm and focus focused in times of crisis. I’m sure that came from growing up in a chaotic household, but whatever it is, I have that ability to talk to people in a way that allows them to stay calm in a moment that they may not think that they can. But I don’t think that I could ever be that kindergarten teacher who does such an amazing job with those kids. I just couldn’t do it so different strokes for different folks.
With that said, your last question is the one I’ll focus on. The thing that I’ve been focusing on in therapy and allowing myself to deal with over the last several years has been understanding why others choose suicide. (I understand some people believe that it’s not a choice.) And with that support others who have lost loved ones to suicide. Now that is an area where I’ve had a much more difficult time being objective and non-emotional. So as a response to your thoughts today, I give myself permission to live in the moment, and not try and compartmentalize everything at that time. It is for sure a healthier way to move forward, and at 57 years old, I am only interested in honest peace. So, I’m choosing that.
I loved this, Tamy! These words are so true and powerful: "...at times, these virtual worlds collide wildly inside of our minds in a given moment. When we awaken to the fact that this collision is inviting us to return to the present moment, we can intentionally come back to the here and now."
Our brains are such powerful time machines, and anxiety and trauma so often want to take the past and slingshot us into the future, and the future is never good when anxiety is at the helm. This is a powerful reminder to stay in today. Thank you!
Thank you for reading and reflecting, Rebecca. So true - our brains are powerful time machines and it takes extra intentionality to live in Presence.
Trauma can have the most in opportune triggers. I’m an emergency veterinarian and have struggled with leaving the events of the day at work so as to be present with my family when home. It’s a continual practice to stay in the present moment. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for reading and reflecting, Casey.
I 100% agree that trauma works its way into our everyday lives through our active minds. That’s where my journey of self-discovery has supported me in having a deep practice of presencing so that I don’t miss out on my life by living in the past/future thoughts in my head.
It definitely takes intention and attention as well as a commitment to practice. We get good at what we practice! 😊💫
I completely relate to the flashes of past & present. Cases I've had that remind me of my own past, or of my family & friends. It's part of our soul connections & our empathic skills. Our ability to walk into any situation & know if it's good or bad right away. That's what makes us great at our jobs, it also makes us more sensitive to our jobs at the same time. I can't tell you how many flashbacks I would have while I was on the ambulance. Sometimes it would get kind of crazy. Like you said; it's about knowing how to bring yourself back into the reality of the moment. That's part of the reason why I went from picking up the pieces on the streets to putting them back together in the OR. Those flashbacks of past & present were sometimes Really hard. Trying to stay in the moment even when you're in the middle of a procedure handing off instruments & the surgeon starts yelling at you for suction because there's a major bleed...Not so good. Thankfully, you're not the only one in there that's scrubbed in.
I've been giving myself permission since I was a little girl, even when I wasn't supposed to. I gave myself permission to cry when I was alone in my room; sitting by my window looking out the window looking at the moon, wondering why I was really here & why I had to deal with so much pain. I had to be the adult at home, I wasn't 'allowed' to be the little girl I was. At my grandparents though I gave myself permission to laugh & play & Be that little girl. As a teen I gave myself permission to hide part of who I was. Only a select few knew I was volunteering at the hospital other than my patients & coworkers. It was part of my escape from the chaos of what was happening at home & school, where no one could find me. It also prepared me for my careers in the medical profession that I couldn't wait to become a part of. It had been my dream & goal ever since I can remember. My mother & I fought over my high school choices because she either didn't want me traveling to school or didn't want me in her old neighborhood because she didn't think it was 'safe'. I just found my own trouble or it found me. High school became my nemesis in more ways than I will share here. My sophomore year was any teen girls worst nightmare come true; the kind of thing you see in movies & pray doesn't happen. I give myself permission to be forgiving but not forget; yet not stay in those tapes playing them over & over again. I give myself permission to grieve the killing of my husband by 2 kids coming home from a party & running the red light. I grieve my husbands death and I give myself permission to forgive those kids. All of them died on the scene before the fire department arrived. Today it's about staying in the moment. I give myself permission to let me be me. I make no excuses or apologies...Love me or hate me, I am who I am, take it or leave it; it's your choice. I not only like who I am, I love who I am today despite what I've been through & I've had to do to get where I am at this moment.
Thank you Tamy
Raven, your share touched me deeply. Thank you for your raw and open sharing . I honor and am inspired by all the permission that you are giving yourself in your life. Thank you for sharing yourself here.🙏✨
Was the cross a gift from his mother to keep him safe on the streets? 💚
thank you for reading and engaging, Don.🙏😊 What’s your takeaway from today’s Permission Slip?
I was thinking about whether I should do this in a post and tag you, or respond here, but since you asked, I will respond here:
I have never been a medical professional, but you and I share careers that have their fair share of traumatic event events. I did child protection investigations for 15 years, moved into working with homelessness and mental health for 8 years, and most recently I have been managing programs in domestic violence and sexually exploited youth work. Since I’ve been doing this work, starting as a therapist with children who experienced traumatic events 30 years ago, I often have gotten the question about how I deal with some of the things that I have seen. The best way that I can answer that is that I have so much respect for the kindergarten teacher who manages her classroom in a way that I could never do. We all have different passions and strengths, and for whatever reason, I have been able to stay calm and focus focused in times of crisis. I’m sure that came from growing up in a chaotic household, but whatever it is, I have that ability to talk to people in a way that allows them to stay calm in a moment that they may not think that they can. But I don’t think that I could ever be that kindergarten teacher who does such an amazing job with those kids. I just couldn’t do it so different strokes for different folks.
With that said, your last question is the one I’ll focus on. The thing that I’ve been focusing on in therapy and allowing myself to deal with over the last several years has been understanding why others choose suicide. (I understand some people believe that it’s not a choice.) And with that support others who have lost loved ones to suicide. Now that is an area where I’ve had a much more difficult time being objective and non-emotional. So as a response to your thoughts today, I give myself permission to live in the moment, and not try and compartmentalize everything at that time. It is for sure a healthier way to move forward, and at 57 years old, I am only interested in honest peace. So, I’m choosing that.
And thank you for helping me consider that. 😊
Thank you for sharing this thoughtful reflection, Don🙏🏻✨you are already the PEACE you seek 💫